After having made his return to Instagram late last year, Armie Hammer is back on our feeds with some car-salesman content. Three years after multiple women came forward and accused him of abuse, sexual misconduct, and violent fetishes, the disgraced actor has kept relatively quiet, save for a lone podcast appearance — in which he said he was “grateful” for those cannibalism allegations — and some group family photos on social media. (Hammer has repeatedly denied all accusations.) But after decamping from the Cayman Islands back to Los Angeles, the soon-to-be 38-year-old seems to be readjusting to a life of bumper-to-bumper sunset traffic and gas guzzling. On Tuesday night, he posted a rare video as an ode to his truck, which he says he plans on selling because he can no longer afford gas prices. The comment section, of course, was as predictably unhinged as a Bushwick warehouse party after 7 a.m.
“So I’ve been back in L.A. for a couple of weeks now. This is my truck. I bought this for myself in 2017 as a Christmas gift for myself,” Armie began. “I have loved this truck intensely and taken it camping and across the country multiple times and on long road trips and I’ve taken it on one last road trip … to CarMax.”
“This is not an ad for CarMax. This is because I’m selling my truck. Since being back in L.A., I have put about $400 or $500 worth of gas in it, and I can’t afford it … I can’t afford the gas anymore,” he continued. “I mean, this truck, it took the kids home from the hospital and all that stuff. Amazing trips, but you know what? That’s okay. I’ve got a new car. It’s tiny. It’s a hybrid. I’m probably going to put about ten bucks of gas in it a month, and this is it.”
I won’t bore you with the rest of the monologue, because Hammer drones on several times after the video should naturally end (like, after “cool …” and “anyways …”). He does, however, speak directly to his beloved truck, saying, “Here’s to new beginnings. It’s my birthday tomorrow. So, August 28, I will be starting my birthday in a new car, in a new apartment, in a new life in Los Angeles,” not to mention the former actor already has offers to buy his car and for film roles in the comments. What’s that people are always saying about canceled men never getting a second shot? Oh wait …
